Persuasion and Manipulation Among Managers

Persuasion and manipulation are two workplace activities that follow many of the same paths yet have different means of achieving their ends. Some managers will engage in persuasion while others will lean towards manipulation. Those who are engaged in persuasion are more likely to gain the respect of their employees while those who are more manipulative often receive immediate gratification but loose out on long-term effectiveness. Companies should recognize and remove manipulators to ensure a positive work environment.

Persuasion is an attempt to show certain facts in a positive light without hiding or leaving out crucial information. It is generally a positive experience. Ultimately the listener can make a free choice on the issue as all the important information is presented to them. The influencer seeks to create a prevailing logic that both parties can agree with that leads from agreement to performance. Manipulation attempts to leave out particular facts and distort their meaning in an effort to change the perception of events.

When trust and persuasion are high the managers words are highly palatable to the listener. The managers experience and knowledge of the situation can help the employee make a better decisions as to their next course of action. When trust is low, and manipulation is high, the immediate gain takes precedence over long-term solutions. Employees could become resistant to the managers wishes and find ways of thwarting their influence.

The risk manipulators face is that someday they may become discovered. A simple discovery of manipulated facts leads to resentment, destruction of trust, and an active attempt to undermine the manager. Employees often respond to manipulators by avoidance and attempting to hold the perpetrator accountable (Bryand & Sias, 2011). The violation of a persons integrity leads to further conflict.

Workplace do not function well off of manipulative tactics as organizational culture will come to reflect that inherent lack of trust and respect. Organizations that do not seek to gain employee trust through open and honest dialogue will ultimately find themselves lacking in performance, embroiled in workplace conflict, involved in legal suits, and suffering from chronic staff turnover. 

Discerning between those who are persuasive and those who are manipulators can be difficult. According to Robin Dreeke, the head of behavioral analysis at the FBI, trust becomes a central issue in developing positive relationships and manipulators have a hard time creating long-term trust (Nahai, 2013). Manipulators are focused on their own needs and often leave others with buyers remorse through unfulfilled promises and self-seeking behavior. 

Manipulators have an inherent disrespect for the integrity of other people and don't see much point in telling the truth. Manipulators exhibit higher levels of Machiavellianism and lower levels of agreeableness that correspond to personality disorders (Wischniewski & Dipl-Psycho, 2013). They will use whatever means work and seek to punish those who do not agree with their methods leading to a retaliatory environment.

All employment sectors are open to the power of manipulators. Whether you are in business, non-profit work, law enforcement, political positions or any other type of employment manipulators can and do exist. Organizations would do well to screen those who manipulate for self-seeking gain in order to reduce potential risks and raise the trust factor among employees and stakeholders.

The higher the position and the more authority the position has the greater the destructive power of manipulation. People unwittingly give unconditional support to certain societal members based upon positional or institutional status. Those less likely to be manipulated are the ones who can question the decision-making processes regardless of the position of the manipulator. Questioning creates critical thinking beyond simple assumptions.

Manipulators are not only dangerous in their personal relationships but also the organizations where they work. In the business world we have idealized people in movies and popular media who will stop at nothing to achieve their goals without regard to the impact on others. Calm,cool, and collect is immortalized. The ends do not justify the means as manipulators eventually ruin previously positive work environments and do incalculable damage to the organizations where they are employed. Creating cultures where manipulation is thwarted and persuasion is appreciated not only shows a level of respect for employees and co-workers but also leads to stronger corporate cultures.

Bryand, E. & Sias, P. (2011). Sensemaking and relational consequences of peer co-worker deception. Communication Monographs, 78 (1).

Nahai, N. (Sept 21, 2013). Trust, Persuasion, and Manipulation. Psychology Today. Retrieve from http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/webs-influence/201309/trust-persuasion-and-manipulation 

Wischniewski, J. & Dipl-Psych, B. (2013). Personality disorder respond to norm violations? Impact of personality factors on economic decision-making. Journal of Personality Disorders, 27 (4).

Three Methods of Mastering Your Mouth for Career Conflict Outcomes

“It is not what you say but how you say it that counts.” Our ability to say the right things at the time they are needed is a very important skill in developing stronger working relationships and advancing our careers. Without a keen mastery of the nuances of language and the emotional intelligence to choose the right timing for choice words it will be difficult for people to advance in their careers. Mastering your mouth can have advantages in workplace conflict.

Let us assume for a minute you are sitting in a board room brooding over the decisions and comments of a meeting member. Instead of working in a collaborative manner he or she is attempting to push their weight around and bully the group into accepting their ideas as their own. This is extremely frustrating to you. The behavior is so destructive that it creates encampment on the team, raises the stress levels, and seems to make everyone agitated.

In business there may be a time and place for a pushy executive that can cram their opinions through a team to make things happen. This is most beneficial in crisis situations but destructive in strategic planning. Despite its advantages in limited situations it can also show a serious lack of respect for the abilities of others and the ability to engage a wider group of stakeholders. The emotional infant has risen.

Before becoming angry and challenging the person directly and publicly it is beneficial to first sit back and think about alternatives that may be more effective in handling this situation.  You may be screaming on the inside and wanting to push back with equal force but a pitched battle could have a disastrous result for the team and the achievement of team goals; not to mention your own career. 

In my experience there are three ways to deal with such an over aggressive person who doesn't seem to understand either the needs or concerns of others. You can 1.) confront, 2.) redirect, or 3.) befriend. Each has their own level of success in helping master the situation.

1.) Confront: Confront is the most common and entails either direct equal force verbal attacks and bullying. An eye for an eye mentality showing the other person you are not going to back down and they must accept your issues. Other variations include escalating the problem to superiors or undermining the bully in subtle ways. One may work sometimes and another may fail disastrously. When a hyper aggressive bully has no sense of common decency you may need to draw a red line and stick to it.

2.) Redirect: Redirecting is the most successful method but does take considerable skill to master well. When an pushy person is sure they are right it is often beneficial to draw them into a conversation by encouraging greater elaboration as well as questioning of their logic. Boisterous individuals love to talk about themselves and drawing them in, redirecting, and drawing in again will help slowly adjust their logic into something more beneficial for the group.

3.) Befriending: Not all pushy people are trying to force their will on others and may actually be defending their needs by posturing. If you suspect the person is really trying to do the right thing but doesn't know how to negotiate well it is better to befriend them and become a sounding board for their needs in a more appropriate manner. You may help the group better bridge the gaps between the varying parties while gaining the trust of each member.

The workplace is always full of different conflicts, problems, and personalities. With a little practice and foresight you can better manager your mouth for a higher outcome. It is an interpersonal skill that takes some time but will place you in a leadership position more through wisdom then brute strength. You will avoid destructive battles that can damage your career while improving on your leadership position within the organization.