Why you shouldn't care about people think of you?

Diogenes
Jean-Léon Gérôme 1824-1904

Beyond normal positive social relationships and trusting business relationships you really shouldn't care much about what people think about you. Most people who judge others do so without any real knowledge of the people they are judging. That judging goes through all types of mental filters in terms of beauty, age, wealth, race, religion, gender and all the other stuff that is associated more with the judger then the person being judged. By the time it comes out on the other end, its unlikely to be an accurate reflection of much other than the judger's deeper preexisting perspectives (observation and sight are different).

For example, I have been judged for having a Muslim sounding name and mixed race kids. While I consider myself a believer in multiple philosophies of God as embodied in most of our major religions (of which I'm a cultural Catholic with some Islamic seasoning) that seems to throw people for a loop. People often dump the basics for the specific and then miss the purpose and intent of religion. There is a balance for both to understand the general nature of order.

Such differences becomes more understandable when you step out to a more wider perspective and find value in the basic messages of each religion that leads to greater awareness of our place in the world and universe. (It is the same in science and its the same in life experience. Understanding each leads also leads to greater insight into what is the same and what is different. I thus take the best of each and incorporate those into a conception of the value of religion.)

The same can be said for race and its impact on the way we view other. While people might not say much, they do act sometimes in ways that are inappropriate. Using inappropriate terms and being rude when there is no justification for doing so. While I think that such behavior creates a toxic environment such as yelling out inappropriate terms describing people at sports events, inappropriate jokes and intentionally manipulative behavior around impressionable mixed race kids, there are others who feel they have the right to do those things (It kind of creates an hard to bridge gap. Not impossible but boundaries must be created first. Wow! That got them mad that someone seen as low as me stats clearly to keep my children out of their problems. I think some call this uppity and others might call the right thing. Just depends on who you ask.). 

If you notice in each of these instances we may find that very outward impressions are coming to define certain groups and social circles of people. While race seems and skin color seem to be the main justifications for poor behaviors, the group seems to have brought in all other elements that create an embodiment of "outsider" as evil and dangerous (Not accepting certain comments is different then being challenging. Sometimes an abrupt change of topic prompts people that something said was incorrect. Other times one might need to specifically address intentionally poor behavior. Easier said then done in a toxic environment of top down group hierarchy. i.e. the philosophical slaves of Plato's forms. As a running joke, they can only strive but will unlikely reach the highest philosophical stage of development known as the beach bum! ). 

I could of course forgive people who are easily manipulated but it does run into a situation when false justification for fear of Muslims, Blacks and probably lots of others seems to run counter to intentionally aggressive, mocking, rude, and provocative behaviors (That shows manipulation and not fear and even if they think all Blacks are selling drugs and All Muslims are violent who are they to make such distorted judgements on people who have been nothing but nice to them. That is hate even if you feel it isn't. I won't sugar coat just because within their Good Old Boy networks it has become fashionable to circumvent freedom of religion, speech, life, liberty and happiness just because its what their friends want.). Patience was key with dealing with this homogeneous group who has become accustomed to bullying people in their community as though they never grew up from high school (If your out of their crowd your just sort of in their way.). 

On a local level it is what it is but I think they will be on the wrong side of history. These sort of Cady Shack mixed with Animal house are on their way out and are left over cultural resisters. They have come to accept the unacceptable and most of society has moved on to a higher place. While I think most of the people are not particularly bad in and of themselves, they are so tied to their network that they lose the bigger perspective of others as well as of themselves. Others may be seen as foreign, different, or worthy of poor treatment. One could not even derail them from their perspectives so I believe that is sort of where the proof in the pudding currently lays. Messed up people making messed up choices because messed up friends wanted them to join in their messed up behaviors so they wouldn't feel messed up on the inside. Kind of messed up if you ask me. 🤷