The Importance of Remorse as a Hate Group Indicator of Reform

The concept of remorse is not weakness, but the underpinnings of growth. Darkness comes from deep seated pain and when people do horrible acts of human indecency that borders on sociopathic depravity there are inherent risks to others. The normal ingrained boundaries that are built into our species (and others) do not function as they should and in turn create a ticking timebomb outward lashing venom designed to damage all in its path that can see past the narcissists mask.  

It is difficult for the legal system and people within society (the ultimate stakeholders) to know when someone has put down their distorted behaviors for healthier outlooks. Most people who commit horrendous acts won't feel much remorse until held to account and one must decipher the difference between actual reform and pretend reform (Based on fear of punishment or community disdain. There is some indication that most of the community, except those most connected to the group, have rejected the hate and distorted narrative. That is a testimony to their strengths.)

According to an article entitled The Power of Remorse and Apology there are a number of elements as they relate to remorse (Friedman, 2006):

(1) Identification of the wrongful act;
(2) Expression of remorse and regret for having committed the act;
(3) Promise to forbear from committing the wrongful act in the future;
(4) Offer of repair.

It should be noted that these were not immature behaviors or mistakes of misunderstanding (They had no qualifications beyond self interest to make such judgements.). There was a wholesale attempt to exploit racial-religious social divisions, involve children, spread false rumors to "cleanse" the community, elder manipulation for personal gain, and utilize a close officer friend (s) to enforce their false narrative (and what appears to radicalize a pre-existing network of corrupt officers 2-5 officers that could have led to death/injury in the wrong situation with the wrong personalities. Some may have been trying to create that situation. There is some indication of a history of these bad behaviors by this officer group. There is also an indication that some officers acted with integrity and did the right thing even though they were initially fed false information and that I can respect; none of us are perfect. Mistakes are understandable in some circumstances.) in order to damage and gain (socially and financially) from other's quick heuristic bias and ignorance (i.e. blind supporters part of a dysfunctional sports network that bully and silence each other through strict social structures of "looking cool". Kind of where the concept of mental slavery and "mob" mentality comes from. That doesn't mean everyone. Most of the people in the larger network are pretty cool...but live within a homogeneous social context. I applaud those that can step outside these networks...and many seem to be doing that. That is a positive thing. They may not know it but they just strengthened their community and its future prospects.).

What I like about the article is that it provides an avenue of understanding remorse. In this situation, I solemnly (at least I think I do. 🤷) hoped to protect children, myself, the community and ensure that the perpetrators obtain the mental health they need; but are unlikely to see for themselves. It could be a win-win situation for all....except the officer that willfully violated the Constitution and promoted what appeared to be very un-American values (There is no room in law enforcement for those types of "bad apples". I  support law enforcement 100% and support 100% the basic civil rights of all Americans regardless of race, religion, or ethnicity embedded into the Constitution. Some of our politicians are having difficulty understanding the complex concept that law enforcement is a necessity but that enforcement must continuously improve and adapt to the needs of all of society to ensure institutional trust and social stability. I have helped officers many times and minorities many times over my lifetime. I regret none of it! We are on the same team and those exploiting those differences are wrong. Think for yourself.).

What I can say is that I tried to act as an adult (and hopefully a leader because of the wider implications. No idea if I actually succeeded....but I stepped where my values nudged me. Hopefully they are the right values. 🤔) and it is up to everyone else to decide truth from falsehood, "cool" from moral conscious, and in turn who and what type of nation will will be in a rapidly changing socio-economic environment (We must learn to tackle these problems. I think there was a good attempt....and I think wisdom trumped ignorance...but it wasn't guaranteed.). Those that know the perpetrator group can answer the question themselves by asking, "Is there genuine remorse?" If there is, great! (They probably don't know this but they forgive the moment I saw the dysfunction. Forgiving and forgetting are different. Some boundaries will likely always need to be in place now.) but if not.... and internal reform is not present then we should ask, "When is the next blow out?"

(Side note: This is a perspective. As far as I know this is a truthful and supported perspective. There are always multiple interpretations to any event and that is our socially constructed realities.) 

 

Friedman, (2006). The Power of Remorse and Apology. The Journal of College and Character, (7) 1.  10.2202/1940-1639.1510